


Firefly got Canceled

by Thinkingthatifpeoplewererain



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Frottage, Future Fic, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Rebound
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-29
Updated: 2015-04-29
Packaged: 2018-03-26 06:39:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3840853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thinkingthatifpeoplewererain/pseuds/Thinkingthatifpeoplewererain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's the classic story of Boy meets girl.</p><p>And the not-so-classic story of Boy still loves childhood best friend, and Girl does not approve.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I wasn’t hard to find when I’m the guy that’s standing here

   Tsukishima Kei and Tsukishima Hotaru had met their first semester of college, when Kei’s birthday gift from his family had been delivered to her dorm. She showed up at their door, and although the cookies his mom had said she baked him in the letter were missing, Kei insisted on taking her for dinner as thanks. It was the first birthday since they had met that Kei and Tadashi did not spend it together.

   It was the beginning of their separation. First Kei moved out of his dorm and got an apartment with Hotaru after 3 months of dating. They promised to hang out, but Tadashi only ever really saw Kei at practice. They didn’t even have study sessions anymore, and they were in two classes together! So Honestly, Yamaguchi Tadashi had no reason to let that abandoning asshole into his apartment at midnight, but there was no denying the fact that he had done just that. It was inevitable that whenever Tsukishima Kei was upset, Yamaguchi Tadashi took care of him. That didn’t mean he had to be nice.  
  

    If it wasn’t for the late hour and the fact that his RA wasn’t the scariest person in all of Japan—though he had a soft spot for Tadashi, most people did— he would be yelling himself hoarse at Kei; Demanding to know why the hell he had neglected their friendship, and why the hell he was here now. He settled for dragging Kei into the room by the collar of his shirt, his anger evident in his uneven gait that had Kei stumbling behind him. He threw Kei down onto the sofa, and peeled Kei’s trembling hand off his bicep. Kei dropped it back into his lap and looked up at Tadashi. His eyes were red and his face was flushed, but the tear tracks on his cheeks indicated this was from crying rather than intoxication. Tadashi also noted that there was no silver chain around his neck, meaning Kei was not wearing the locket his girlfriend had given him. And since Kei always wore it, even during games, Hotaru was probably his ex-girlfriend. Well that explained things.

   Yamaguchi left Kei and came back with some sweats. Kei went to the bathroom to change, and was foolishly surprised not to see a litter box by the toilet. The last time he had been in this apartment, Tadashi had been nursing an injured stray back to health. Of course, after six months Tadashi would have found a permanent home for the cat, but it was another reminder of how little their lives intersected. Kei changed out of his clothes and into the sweats, staring dully at his reflection for a few minutes before he worked up the guts go back and face Tadashi.

   Tadashi was setting a glass of water and a bowl of strawberries on the table. It was a sweet gesture, but Kei knew he did not deserve this and the knowledge sat heavy in his churning gut. He wanted Tadashi to handle him roughly like he did before, to be angry at him. So Kei did the one thing that always pissed people off: he opened his mouth.

   “It's kind of sad that even after I've ignored you for nearly half a year you're still looking after me like one of your strays.” His voice was rough and toneless.

   Yamaguchi smiled beatifically, and the weight in Kei’s stomach flipped.

   “I enjoy taking care of helpless things. So if you want to make up for being a shitty friend, stop wallowing in self-loathing and let me feed you.”

   “I’m not hungry”

   Tadashi rolled his eyes and stood up. Kei gulped, anticipating that he was about to dragged to the table, but Tadashi just put the fruit into the fridge.

   “You’re going to drink that water though, and I don’t care if you’re thirsty or not.”

   Kei padded over the table and sat down. He stared at the glass of water, entranced by condensation dripping down the sides. He heard the refrigerator door shut gently and the gentle scrape of wood on tile as Tadashi pulled his chair in.

  "Drink up, buttercup.”

  “You’re spending too much time with Kuroo.” Kei said, with an exaggerated tone of disgust.

   But he drank the whole the glass, finishing it in three gulps.

   “Happy?”

   Tadashi hummed contemplatively, and stood up. When he walked into the bedroom, Kei followed behind him like a baby duckling.


	2. So Let's Skip the How You Been

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yamaguchi investigates the reasons for Kei's msyterious re-apearance, but just like a PD James Novel, all the actual plot gets put on hold for sex and allusions to classical literature.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoah look at me getting out another chapter like a few hours after the first one. I am like a fucking smut machine.
> 
> this Chapter is dedicated to Gabriel, for being the grease to my smut machine.

Tadashi is sitting on his bed staring at Kei, who stopped moving once he reach the door to the bedroom. It’s like he’s some kind of vampire who had to be invited in, although Tadashi hasalways  thought of him more along the lines of a fairy, mischievious and slightly sadistic but willing to show favor upon those who pleased him.  Even after what Kuroo likes refer as Kei's Grand Brotrayal, Tadashi still sees him as fairy. When they had to read Keats’s _Dame Belle Sans Merci_ in his World Folklore class, Kei was the first thing that came to mind.

These thoughts are dropped as Kei begins to cry again. Maybe he shouldn’t have made him drink that water after all.

Tadashi is unsurprised to find the part of him that wants to hugs Kei and kiss the tears from his eyes and make everything ok has awoken again after seeing him cry.

Tadashi is surprised to find another part of him, that wants to see Kei cry, that wants to poke at his wounds and laugh when he winces, is also awake and ready to play. And maybe that part was always there. Maybe it was part of the reason he always pushed Kei so hard. Maybe that part of him was able to get satisfaction from seeing Kei cry when he would confide in Tadashi back when they were close. But now it’s out for blood. Well not blood, more just mild emotional trauma.

And now that voice is telling him to force Kei to tell him why he’s here.

“What made you decide to throw yourself on the mercy of the person you hurt the most?”

Tadashi doesn’t know if he regrets actually saying that out loud.

Kei clenches the doorframe and makes a choking noise.

“I can sleep on the couch.”

“No you can’t, come here.”

Tadashi pulls the covers up on the other side of the bed and stares at Kei. Kei looks afraid but he obeys, sliding his legs under the covers and smoothing them down. He takes off his glasses and folds them gently, scowling when he realizes he has nowhere to set them down; the dresser is Tadashi’s side of the bed. Tadashi gently bumps the hand holding the glasses and Kei lets him take them, and lays down.

He feels Tadashi’s hand stroking his hair and gently butts his head against it. Tadashi’s arm moves to Kei’s shoulders so he can pull their bodies together. Spooning Kei feels good, even in this situation. He can feel the rise and fall of Kei’s chest against his arms, and it seems like proof that this was meant to be. Kei fits so well in his arms, and he’s managed to fall asleep after just a few minutes of cuddling with Tadashi when he usually tosses and turns all nights. It’s almost a shame Tadashi has to wake him up, but they have early practice and he knows if he talks to Kei when he isn’t so sleep-deprived he can think of a place to run to; he’ll run there.

Kei is woke by teeth nipping the back of his neck. Tadashi is spooning him, which is terrible because it’s exactly what he wanted. His only consolation is that he doesn’t have to look him in the eye.

“You never told me why you’re here, Kei.”

Kei just grunts. Tadashi nips his neck again, hard enough to make him yelp.

“You know I have your cellphone, I can just call Hotaru and ask her to pick you up.”

“She won’t.”

“What did you do to her? Did you kill her?”

“I said your name when we fucked.”

Tadashi snorts

"Yeah, sure. Just like I said yours last night in the shower."

Tadashi blows gently against Kei’s neck and moans his name.

Kei jerks from the sudden chill against his neck, and his ass pushes against Tadashi’s half-chub. Tadashi moans again, this time; it’s expletives. He pulls Kei’s hips against his and grinds, his penis now fully erect, ready to wreck himself against those firm buttocks. Kei presses his palm against Tadashi’s hands where they pin him down.

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No, no I want to hold your hand.”

Tadashi can’t help but laugh. He holds Kei’s hand with his left hand and entwines their fingers. Kei starts grinding against Tadashi’s cock, his free hand stroking his own to the same rhythm. He makes a noise between a gasp and a grunt as Tadashi’s right hand comes up to cup his balls. It is not a particularly sexy noise, but the fact that his actions caused it sends a shiver down Tadashi’s spine. He squeezes gently and is rewarded with more grunting. It takes only a few minutes of being bounced between the squeeze of Tadashi’s hand and the push of his hips for Kei to lose the rhythm they’ve established. He writhes against Tadashi’s boner like a dying bug before Tadashi pushes him facedown into the mattress. The hand Kei has around his dick is trapped and Tadashi pulls away every time he tries to push against him. Kei keens, desperate to finish. He’d beg but he doesn’t have the words anymore. Kei is exhausted and horny and he needs someone to touch him or he will literally die. Tadashi’s weight lift off his back but he doesn’t turn around. He hears the crinkle of a condom wrapper, and then Tadashi is flipping him over with one hand, the other quickly stroking his own erection. Kei wonders why he didn't take out any lube when Tadashi kneels down by his dick and takes it into his mouth. Kei comes instantly, too sated to feel ashamed.  Yamaguchi pulls off with a pop and satisfied grin. He swallows and then licks his lips, giving Kei a look that says “I wouldn’t mind eating the rest of you, too. In fact I promise you I will devour you whole and you will love it.”

“I didn’t feel like changing the sheets” is what Tadashi actually says.

Kei understands, but his post-coital brain only wants Tadashi to spoon him again, and is entirely unconcerned as to the reason why that is not happening. Tadashi stands up and walks over to the garbage can to throw away the condom. As soon as Tadashi is within his reach he grabs him around the midriff and pulls him onto the bed. Tadashi's lungs are compressed with a force that knocks the air out of him. Tadashi doesn't complain, what's a little breathlessness when it's just proof of how much Kei wants to be with him. Kei has matured in many ways, but he still is reluctant to initiate physical contact. Although maybe that isn't true anymore. Maybe Kei touches Hotaru with blatant longing all the time.

 All the bliss he felt from orgasm and being in Kei's arms drains out of him.

"What's wrong?" Kei asks, nuzzling into Tadashi's neck.

"Nothing." He tries to escape from Kei's grasp. His grip loosens but when Tadashi turns towards Kei and tries to sit up, Kei pulls him into his chest.

"It's something."

They stare into each other's eyes, each waiting for their bedmate to look away and give up. Tadashi starts giggling from the tension, and Kei rolls his eyes.

"Tell me."

"You didn't tell me why she dumped you."

Kei scowls.

"I proposed, she said yes, and then she changed her mind about getting married to me. And then she changed her mind about dating me at all."

"Oh." He regrets asking, so much. He doesn't know  whether to be mad at Kei for proposing to a girl after 6 months of dating, to be mad at Hotaru for being a jerk to the man he is hopelessly in love with, or to be mad at himself; for wishing that Kei secretly loved him and  had actually yelled his name when fucking her.  

"Now you go."

What should he say? What can he possibly say that won't make Kei realize Tadashi isn't just gay as hell, he is gay as hell for Kei in particular.

"I told you, it's nothing" Smooth, Tadashi, Kei will totally drop it now.

Kei looks at him, and then sighs dramatically.

"You're jealous."

Tadashi nods.

"You can fuck me in the ass tomorrow. Hotaru and I never did anal."

"And they say romance is dead."

Kei just kisses him and drags the blankets over the two of them. It feels stuffy inside the cocoon of sheets and blankets Kei has assembled, but Tadashi is too tired to do anything but shut his eyes and sleep.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave feedback, I like attention.  
> Also IDK if Keats counts as classic literature but I do know IDGAF.


	3. ‘Cause I feel us drowning in a sea spilled from a cup

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not eggxactly how he hoped this morning would go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you didn't already know, Chapter 2 was rewritten so you should go read at least the last 3 paragraphs of it before this chapter.
> 
> Trigger warning for food waste & disordered eating in this chapter

Kei wakes up without a mouthful of someone else’s tangled curls for the first time in ages, and it feels odd to be able to breathe. The urge to nuzzle into Tadashi’s mussed hair seems right so he does it, inhaling the scent of artificial grapefruit and post-coital sweat. He wonders what if would be like to get used to waking up like this every morning. But dwelling on what he can’t have will only spoil his mood. For now he’ll just enjoy the way Tadashi hums contentedly against his chest as Kei massages his neck with his thumb. In fifteen minutes, he’ll go make breakfast, like he always does after a one night stand. He briefly considers leaving a goodbye note with the food and walking out the door, also like he usually does, but he doesn’t want to leave. Tadashi’s dorm is closer to the gym where they have practice in an hour, so he has no good reason to, even if he did. He doesn’t even really want to make breakfast since it requires him to stop cuddling, but he wants to take care of Tadashi, even if it’s just by taking care of small chores.

The dorm rooms don’t have a full kitchen, just a kitchenette with a refrigerator, a sink, and some cabinets, but Tadashi has a hot plate so he doesn’t have to use the communal kitchen. Kei grabs eggs, milk and butter from the fridge.

He serenades the eggs as he mixes them, crooning “Before you came into my life, I missed you soo bad, I missed you so bad! I missed you! So, so bad! Before you—”

Tadashi snickers from the corner and Kei drops the eggs on the floor in surprise. So much for making things easier. He grabs the paper towels from Tadashi’s hands.

“I’ll clean up. It’s my fault.”  
“But I—”

“I’ll take care of it.”

Tadashi opens his mouth and closes it again. He grasps Kei’s shoulder and looks him in the eye, concern evident even under the smile he’s faking. He breathes deeply, in and out, and Kei breathes with him.

“Can I hug you?”

“I’m kind of covered in egg.” Kei laughs hollowly.

“So No, then?”

Kei looks away and holds his arms out. Tadashi presses their chests together and loosely wraps his arms around Kei’s waist. He gently sways and it makes Kei feel even more nauseous but he doesn’t want to complain.

“It’s ok, really. It’s ok.”

Kei nods, and Tadashi tightens his grip before letting go and pressing a kiss to Kei’s cheek.

“Are you sure you don’t want help?”

“Yeah, you go shower, we have practice in an hour.”

“Fuck!”

Tadashi dashes back to his room, and Kei assesses the situation. He was using a plastic mixing bowl so he doesn’t have to worry about cutting himself on glass, but the whole floor of the kitchenette is covered in egg and it’s starting to seep into the carpeting. He can fix it, though. Thinking about the fact that it’s very pathetic he’s crying literally over spilled milk (and eggs) is not helpful, so he will stop. Instead he’ll let Tadashi’s words repeat in his head. _It’s ok, really, it’s ok._ When he’s finished, the clock says it took him fifteen minutes but it didn’t feel like it took him any time at all. He has no memory of actually cleaning, but clearly he did.

The sound of running water ends and Tadashi sticks his head out the bedroom door to let Kei know he can shower. Kei nods and walks into the bathroom. He takes of his clothes, and turns on the water, but it takes him a few minutes of staring at the shower to work himself up to the point where he can get in. By then the water is cold, but it cuts through the numbness that's settled over him like a thick blanket.

This morning is sign he should go back to the counselor he saw the last time his brain started doing this shit, but he doesn’t know if he can bear tell her that that the reasons his fucked-up head is acting particularly fucked up again especially after he thought he was done, and that he could be normal. She told him that was unlikely, but he can’t help but thinking how different he felt with Hotaru, almost like another person, a stronger person. When he used to stare like this Hotaru would just laugh and ask him if he was waiting for her. She'd shampoo his hair for him and bathe him without it feeling like she was coddling him. Hotaru never looked at him with concern the way Tadashi does. He ignores the fact that before their six month separation, Tadashi never did either. He reacted to Kei zoning out pretty much the same way, just without the same kind of romantic intimacy.

The counselor won’t judge him or tell anyone when he tells her, he knows that, but still… it’s frightening to imagine himself telling someone else what he did in the light of day. And it feels almost like giving up. He remembers what Hotaru told him the first time she came home to find him in bed staring at the ceilings, under the covers with his coat and his shoes on. "You and I, we're strong people. Even we have moments of weakness, it doesn't mean we're weak. Doesn't mean we have to see a shrink and cry about it. Just means we have to take care of each other, yeah?"

Nah, He has to go see a counselor, his fear be damned, “normal” be damned. He's sick of feeling fragile. Maybe he's not a strong person after all, but he'd at least like to stop feeling exhausted all the time.

Tadashi opens the door, and Kei realizes he's been tuning out his knocking for a while. He turns off the water.

"I'm not... I'm going..."

Tadashi just nods and waits for him to find the words, smoothing down the shirt and shorts draped over his arms like he's petting a cat.

"I need to see somebody. Like not a person, well yes a person but a counselor person."

Tadashi looks relieved'

"Do you want me to walk you there? If you don't want the Captain to know, I can say you have a fever and I needed to take care of you or something."

Kei feels a tug at his heart, a good kind.

"That would be nice, but you can tell him the truth, just... I don't want the rest of the team to know."

"Not even Kuroo?" Kuroo had taken Kei under his wing yet again, although it wasn't really that surprising considering they were now playing for the same team. Kuroo was also the person who took Kei to the counselors the first time.

"He'll probably figure it out."

"Ok, um, I'll leave these with you then.” He dropped the clothes on the sink and left.

Kei was able to put them on without going numb again, but his nausea was back full force. He and Tadashi each drank a protein shake before they leave, since they didn't have time for a full breakfast

Tadashi seemed to notice and grabs Kei's hand with both of his, massaging it gently while he babbles about his Folklore TA's tattoos and lists what he's going to eat for lunch. Kei feels guilty at the reminder that they didn't have a real breakfast, and it's all his fault. Tadashi informs Kei he'll be cooking lunch for the both of them, and his shame and discomfort lessens. He doesn't know if it's due to the fact he'll be doing something for Tadashi or if it's the confirmation that he still wants to spend time with him.

They reach the counselors office and because Kei didn't make an appointment he has to fill out a little form to say why he's here and which counselor he'd like to see. He checks the box next to the words "Personal crisis" even if it seems melodramatic because there is no "other" box and he's pretty sure that his situation doesn't fall under "Academic overload" or "career counseling", and writes in Izumi Rei. He gives it to the receptionist and they sit in the waiting area until his named is called. Tadashi squeezes his hand and they both stand up.

"Do you want me to wait for you?"

"No you go to practice, I'll be fine coming back by myself."

"Ok. If you're not, call me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Next chapter will be the end of this story and then we move onto the next story! Also title got chnaged because the series will be called bumpy road

**Author's Note:**

> This work is unbeta-ed. concrit is still welcome.


End file.
